Why Order Is Important

“…that they admonish the young women to love their husbands, to love their children, to be discreet, chaste, homemakers, good, obedient to their own husbands, that the word of God may not be blasphemed.” Titus 2: 4-5

“The wise woman builds her house, but the foolish pulls it down with her hands.” Proverbs 14:1

Growing up and several years into womanhood, homemaking was not on my agenda. Even as a Christian, I did not understand this was God’s role for me in His plan. I still receive chuckles from old friends and family when they see who I am now compared to what I was then. I believe more than anything, it saddens me at all the years I wasted peddling my time to trivial matters of the world when I could have been working on my calling based on God’s Word. But, my excuse…nobody told me!

I see young ladies all around me preparing for marriage with no knowledge of how to care for a home and family. They are in the same situation I was in and sometimes worse. Because I lived on my own for several years before marriage, I at least knew how to care for a home and a few basic meals. At a very early age I learned the responsibilities of housework because my both my parents were away working. But there is something much different between checking off the to-do list and putting your heart and soul into a home for the glory of God. “If anyone speaks, let him speak as the oracles of God. If anyone ministers, let him do it as with the ability which God supplies, that in all things God may be glorified through Jesus Christ, to whom belong the glory and the dominion forever and ever. Amen.” 1 Peter 4:11. The word “minister” means “to serve.” As I serve my husband and children daily, my prayer each day and each night is that God be glorified in the work of my hands.

So, what does all this have to do with order and calmness? Well, I imagine our life without order. I imagine our life where the children make their own schedules and run free with no obedience or boundaries. I imagine that the work I do, if any, is immediately done in vain as my children run about with no instruction or understanding of what is acceptable behavior. I imagine that because of this, I become stressed. Not only do I become irritated by the building chaos but also I snap and yell at my children. My husband comes home from a hard day at work to clutter and disorganization. He must wait on his dinner. In his hunger and frustration from a hard day, he becomes irritated because now it is up to him to try to gain control. He becomes angry with me for not maintaining control and of course, my response to him is one of harshness and not love. I believe I may have just described most homes in America…with or without fathers.

However, this is not the vision God has for us. God calls us wives to allow our husbands to see our beauty inside… “rather let it be the hidden person of the heart, with the incorruptible beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is very precious in the sight of God.” 1 Peter 3:4. The above scenario does not lean towards a quiet and gentle spirit, at least for me it does not.

Order, calmness, and routine in our home and with our children allow us to have peace in a chaotic world. When husbands and wives, fathers and sons, and daughters and mothers are turning against each other…let us turn towards each other. (Malachi 4:6) I challenge you to follow God’s plan and lay down your own needs and frustrations and serve your family with the joy of the Lord.

The Home Series

Order in the Home

A Taste of Home

Why Order Is Important

The Piece That Holds It All Together- upcoming

A Little Taste of Home

Come with me and take a walk inside…let me share with you some of my favorite things about our home. This is post 3 in The Home Series. As you will see, I adore cozy and country. So, grab some sweet iced tea and come on…

These are two views of my all time favorite room.

This room is usually toy free…it is where we enjoy our meals and can sit with no distractions. The low lighting of the lamps are perfect for cozy.

I believe fresh flowers are wonderful and I don’t put them out enough. So, ladies, next time you make a trip to the store…treat yourself to a fresh bouquet. It will really add freshness to the room.

Nothing says country like an embroidered pillow thrown in an old chair…

I also like to change up my decor with the seasons…

This is our Wedding Sampler located in our bedroom…Genesis 2:24. Hanging below is an antique towel rack I use for my necklaces.

So, there is a taste of some of my favorites. What do you like about your own home? We spend our days worrying about what is not right. Take today to think about the things you love and what God has blessed you with in your home.

The Home Series

Order in the Home

A Taste of Home- This post!

Why Order Is Important- upcoming

The Piece That Holds It All Together- upcoming

Order In the Home

I hope since my last post you had a chance to check out Fly Lady. My home was never in CHAOS (Can’t Have Anyone Over Syndrome). But Fly Lady’s routines were right up my alley. I love schedule and routine. Since having children, there have been a little fewer schedules and a lot more routine. I believe routine is pertinent for the development of anything, but flexibility is just as important for our mental sanity. (That’s another post for another day.) My purpose today is to talk about how we can handle our weekly chores.

Explaining weekly chores requires a little bit of explanation about our day. It is very important for Mommy, especially Stay at Home Mommy to be up and at it before anyone else in the house. (If not, Mommy may not get a shower…I know we’ve all been there. And please don’t forget to brush your teeth.) On an ideal day, my day starts between 5:30 and 6:00. I use this time to shower and get myself ready, clean my bathroom, iron Big Daddy’s clothes for the day, and make my bed. On my better days this is when I exercise or read for the day.

I have a few chores that I complete daily. Obviously, staying home means dear ol’ kitchen is cleaned around three times a day. Other daily chores include kitty litter, sweeping the wood floors, and whatever Fly Lady Zone I’m working in. (The daily chore from Fly Lady divides your home into zones. You work on one zone per week leaving no need for spring-cleaning. This coming week we’ll be in the kitchen.) Another daily thing for any mommy wanting to keep her home clear of clutter is a pick-up. Often pick-ups seem overwhelming but if everything has a place this should only take 5-10 minutes. I usually do this twice a day. Once in the morning and once before the kids go to bed while they are doing toy pick up. I also try to do small pick ups throughout the day just to maintain some kind of control.

Now to those pesky weekly chores, this is what my weekly chores look like:

I can’t imagine trying to do all my chores in one day with two toddlers. I remember my mom worked and we usually had a cleaning day. That was when I was older and there was only one child. I know for me things changed a lot from even one to two. I also can’t imagine what it will be like as our toddler and preschool world grows. I do know without some sort of routine, CHAOS will wreak havoc.

I try to finish all my daily and weekly chores by 9:30 and 10:00AM so that I am available for my babies…the real reason I’m present in this home. Besides, with potty breaks, diaper changes, meals, and squabbles…I really don’t have time for housework to be in my way!

I really hope this is as informational, (and maybe even a little inspirational), as I want it to be. I believe we can all have more peace when there is order around us. There are more posts to come, including the favorite things about my home, why I think order is important, and maybe even…my least favorite things about my home. I know many of you mommies are a few years ahead of me on this game…so, please, any tips you would like to share would be great! Let me know if you have any other ideas or questions about having a clean and quiet home.

The Home Series

Order in the Home- This post!

A Taste of Home- upcoming

Why Order Is Important- upcoming

The Piece That Holds It All Together- upcoming

The Home Series

The vision I have for my home is one of calm and control…two things that have not been in existence for almost a month now…let me quote a recent Facebook status: “After a month of birthdays, a funeral 2 3-day trips, two rounds of a weeks worth of poo, a yard sale, and changing out closets for the season... I’ve made an attempt to get this house under some kind of control. After replacing an entire shelf of books back on the book shelf, I walked over a container of dumped out crayons, passed a bowl of cheerios dumped in the kitchen floor, made myself a warm beverage and for the first time sent my kids to their rooms and said, I need a minute.” Because I did, I needed a minute. I needed an hour…or two. I wanted someone to just come get them so I could get this place back to a clean slate. I seriously almost started crying when J.J. sat down, dumped the Cheerios in the floor, and in the back ground I heard Lily wanting me to change her shirt because she dropped yogurt on it.

Today…I have found peace in a clean home. And I have decided with the beginning of my favorite season and the month of October, I will share a little taste of home. How do things work around here? What are some of my favorite things about home? Why do I think calm and control are so important?

Along with this little series of posts, I’m going to do a Daily Do on my Facebook page for one week…not on a blog page but that little Facebook badge down there on your right. If you are not already, “friend” me to get the “To Do’s.”

The list of chores I give you will help put you ahead where you will never have to spring clean your home! Each day you will do something small to get yourself a step ahead of the game. Several months ago I became acquainted with FlyLady. It didn’t take long for her 20 trillion emails to overwhelm my account and I signed off. I believe I have found a method that will help calm the email chaos and want to share the love with you. I’ll handle the emails and will post my daily “To Do’s” for you so you don’t have to check it out. Rather than using the email method, following FlyLady on Twitter or Facebook allows you to choose what you want to read without taking too much time and space with your email account.

I do suggest checking out FlyLady to learn about shining your sink and 15 minute clean ups.

I look forward to getting a handle on all the messes with you! Stay tuned for my upcoming post about how I handle daily and weekly chores.

The Home Series - This post

Order in the Home- upcoming

A Taste of Home- upcoming

Why Order Is Important- upcoming

The Piece That Holds It All Together- upcoming

Papaw Sneed: One of the Lord’s giants

As we drove into Athens for my papaw’s funeral on Wednesday, I told Nate about what came to my mind when I thought of him. Papaw Sneed to me was overalls, circus peanuts, chap stick, and chewing tobacco. It’s amazing the things you learn about the one’s you love when they are gone.

I knew he was a preacher back in the day. I didn’t know it was for 51 years. I knew he loved the lake and stayed there every summer. I didn’t know he liked to have his feet rubbed. I knew he was married to my mamaw for 64 years. I didn’t know how sweet they were with each other until I saw her kiss him and clean his face while he was in the hospital that last week. I knew he loved his family. I didn’t know he loved us so much he would recognize each one of us on his death bed. (And there are a lot of us!)

Papaw Sneed is one of those people in my life that I wished I could have been around more…that I wished I could have talked to more…that I wish I could have loved more.

As he laid there peacefully in his overalls with a Bible in his hands, I had to agree with the man giving the message that night…he was one of the Lord’s giants…

Marion Alfred “Bo” Sneed

November 20. 1929- September 6, 2010

Lily turns 3!

My little angel has turned three! I remember the days when she was a small baby and I couldn’t wait to have a toddler that spoke to me and walked with me. Some days, I can’t even remember that little baby…even though it by no means seems like she has been with us for three years. If you will recall, JJ wasn’t exactly the most peaceful addition to our lives. Lily, however, was just the opposite.

Lily is calm and sweet. It is only those that she loves the most that can calm her tears and her fears. Nate likes to refer to her as my little clone. I believe it is because she picked up those qualities of mine that drives him the most crazy. She doesn’t like to be tickled…except by her mommy. She really isn’t affectionate…except when she wants to be. And much to my dismay, she has my tone of voice and the ability to look at you like you are the dumbest person on Earth. Since the age of 2 ½, I have come to believe that God gave me Lily as a mirror to remind of who I am…to remind me of the life I am shaping and therefore, how much I need to work on me.

Just the other day, we were discussing how much she is like me. And I thought what an awesome gift to see what that sweet spirit can be when it is nurtured and protected by the hard things in life. From day one, she was the one I wanted to protect. She was the one I shielded from everyone else. I wouldn’t allow anyone to harm her. (Especially all those nut jobs that had already raised kids…because God knows they don’t know what they were doing. I read it in a book; I knew a little more than they did.) And this very day, I still stand protecting her. I will until I know she doesn’t need it anymore.

Lily had an interesting birthday. She attended her great grandfather’s funeral and luckily met her aunt and two first cousins for the first time ever. And after all that …we got our party on!

 

Turtle-shaped bacon cheeseburgers make me sick…

Things sure look different around here the last two weeks. In case you missed the hint, baby #3 is on the way. Momma has gone from excited to feeling like poo. And may I add Resolution #6 didn’t happen. I find my husband cleaning up the dinner dishes and preparing meals when he is home. He does whatever it takes to lighten my load. He has been amazing and his take is… “We can’t let happen what happened last time.” You can read about that briefly HERE.

Mere weeks ago seem like an eternity…the days when I was proclaiming God had control of my womb. (Well, at least to #4.) Now, I’m looking at Nate saying, “I can’t do this again.” So now begins the battle of my will over conviction. I spend my days thinking about whether I truly have a conviction. I ask myself, “Is there anything wrong with stopping?” And in my head, the reply I get is, “Are you trusting God?” The best advice I have received is from my friend, mother of 5 boys. She says just “take it one baby at a time.” And today, that’s what I am doing.

I have reaffirmed my knowledge of how much people, even Christians, really just don’t care for children. Oh sure, they say they do…but when you get past one or two they go from a blessing to a burden in most people’s minds. I first came to this knowledge when Jim Bob and Michelle Duggar came out a few years back; I think they were only on number 17 then! I caught the show and adored this family. They had an unbelievable love for God, great family function, and awesome work ethic. I thought they were amazing. And then I realized I was alone. People, again, even Christians, can’t stand the Duggars. Why? Basically, they are disliked because they have no business having that many children…and that’s it. Never mind their obvious love and devotion to their Christian faith. Never mind these are brothers and sisters in Christ. Never mind that’s it is nobody’s business how many kids ANYONE has. And never mind that before those children were formed in their mother’s womb, our God knew them.

So, with mere baby #3, I get to face the culture against life. Here is what I have received:

You have got to be kidding me? I thought you did something to have that fixed.

No. Noooo. Oh well.

You are on your way to be Kate Plus 8.

You are on your way to a reality show.

They’ve got to get out of that church before they have too many babies!

You’re going to be like those Amish people if you don’t learn what birth control is!

And everybody’s favorite, Don’t you know what causes that?! (Which to my response has become…look them in the eye and dead serious say, “No, we can not figure out what keeps causing this!)

When did having more than two children become such a bad thing? Why do people feel compelled to explain how having two children is so much better than more? From what I’ve gathered the answer is self. People value their stuff and their own time more than they do having babies. I read a great article recently on how we multiply what we value. And how true it is. Our culture is all about increasing our bank accounts, our houses, our cars, and other treasures…and more children just might get in the way of that. People view children as a burden to the enjoyment of their own life. (And what’s that Bible verse my blog is based around?)

Christian families having unknowingly fell into the culture against life. Instead of rejoicing at another Christian family’s decision to increase the kingdom of God, they ostracize those that find joy in having children. In doing so, they deny the Word of God. They deny that a man is blessed whose quiver is full. (Psalms 127) If we believe God’s Word that children are a reward and the best gift besides grace He could give us, why wouldn’t we want more?

As I walked down the hall with my precious Jay yesterday, I gave him a sweet kiss and thought to myself, I could do this hundred more times…if I just didn’t have to be pregnant! The thought of it makes me nauseous…but then again, everything makes me nauseous right now….especially turtle-shaped bacon cheeseburgers.