The Piece That Holds It All Together

The past couple of weeks I have painted a picture of order and peace with a splash of beauty. I have shared the way I manage to accomplish things and why I think order is such a necessity in family life. However, as I finish off this series of post, I must add the most important part… the awareness that no home is the same, no situation is the same, and no mom personality is the same. For a good look at different personalities, check out A Slob Comes Clean; this is a recent find of mine that I love…she has a great way of keeping things real and in perspective for the anti-procrastinating, neat freak type like me.

I was also reminded of how different situations can be as I spoke with my very pregnant friend a few weeks back. She has three times the amount of children I do and her husband leaves very early and comes home a little later because of his drive to work. As I spoke of my little orderly world, she reminded me of exactly how blessed I am on a day-to-day basis because of one reason.

See, I have something some of you may not have…it’s that guy we refer to as “Nate” on this blog. Without him, the order and peace would be a lot harder. First and foremost, he supports what I do as a homemaker. He lifts me up and praises me. He makes my life easier by usually having a pleasant and supportive attitude. He gives me that support because he believes as much as I do that home is where the wife and mother belong.

Nate also has a little awareness of how weary a mom can get doing the tasks of the homemaker…especially when you add in godly character training for the children. We see him most every day for lunch. After work and on the weekends, he doesn’t go off with his buddies frolicking like so many other men. He is home with us because this is what makes him happy. He doesn’t want to miss his children grow into adults; he wants to be there for it all. He even once said, “I can’t wait to come home every day.” And not only is he home, he is involved.

After dinner, when most moms have the entire load of kitchen and baths and bedtime to handle, Nate is there with me. Every single night I can count on him to give the babies their baths and entertain them before bed…which leaves me time to clean the kitchen and pick up the house from the busy evening. Because of that consistency, every night from 6:00- 7:30PM, our children know that Dad and Mom will be spending family time with them. And Mom knows that everything will be taken care of before bedtime, so I can just relax and have fun.

I know that without him, maintaining my vision for a godly home would be a lot harder. My patience would be thinner and I would grow much wearier. So all that order and peace, he is what holds it all together…or maybe he’s just what holds me all together.

The Home Series

Order in the Home

A Taste of Home

Why Order Is Important

The Piece That Holds It All Together- this post!

Why Order Is Important

“…that they admonish the young women to love their husbands, to love their children, to be discreet, chaste, homemakers, good, obedient to their own husbands, that the word of God may not be blasphemed.” Titus 2: 4-5

“The wise woman builds her house, but the foolish pulls it down with her hands.” Proverbs 14:1

Growing up and several years into womanhood, homemaking was not on my agenda. Even as a Christian, I did not understand this was God’s role for me in His plan. I still receive chuckles from old friends and family when they see who I am now compared to what I was then. I believe more than anything, it saddens me at all the years I wasted peddling my time to trivial matters of the world when I could have been working on my calling based on God’s Word. But, my excuse…nobody told me!

I see young ladies all around me preparing for marriage with no knowledge of how to care for a home and family. They are in the same situation I was in and sometimes worse. Because I lived on my own for several years before marriage, I at least knew how to care for a home and a few basic meals. At a very early age I learned the responsibilities of housework because my both my parents were away working. But there is something much different between checking off the to-do list and putting your heart and soul into a home for the glory of God. “If anyone speaks, let him speak as the oracles of God. If anyone ministers, let him do it as with the ability which God supplies, that in all things God may be glorified through Jesus Christ, to whom belong the glory and the dominion forever and ever. Amen.” 1 Peter 4:11. The word “minister” means “to serve.” As I serve my husband and children daily, my prayer each day and each night is that God be glorified in the work of my hands.

So, what does all this have to do with order and calmness? Well, I imagine our life without order. I imagine our life where the children make their own schedules and run free with no obedience or boundaries. I imagine that the work I do, if any, is immediately done in vain as my children run about with no instruction or understanding of what is acceptable behavior. I imagine that because of this, I become stressed. Not only do I become irritated by the building chaos but also I snap and yell at my children. My husband comes home from a hard day at work to clutter and disorganization. He must wait on his dinner. In his hunger and frustration from a hard day, he becomes irritated because now it is up to him to try to gain control. He becomes angry with me for not maintaining control and of course, my response to him is one of harshness and not love. I believe I may have just described most homes in America…with or without fathers.

However, this is not the vision God has for us. God calls us wives to allow our husbands to see our beauty inside… “rather let it be the hidden person of the heart, with the incorruptible beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is very precious in the sight of God.” 1 Peter 3:4. The above scenario does not lean towards a quiet and gentle spirit, at least for me it does not.

Order, calmness, and routine in our home and with our children allow us to have peace in a chaotic world. When husbands and wives, fathers and sons, and daughters and mothers are turning against each other…let us turn towards each other. (Malachi 4:6) I challenge you to follow God’s plan and lay down your own needs and frustrations and serve your family with the joy of the Lord.

The Home Series

Order in the Home

A Taste of Home

Why Order Is Important

The Piece That Holds It All Together- upcoming

Order In the Home

I hope since my last post you had a chance to check out Fly Lady. My home was never in CHAOS (Can’t Have Anyone Over Syndrome). But Fly Lady’s routines were right up my alley. I love schedule and routine. Since having children, there have been a little fewer schedules and a lot more routine. I believe routine is pertinent for the development of anything, but flexibility is just as important for our mental sanity. (That’s another post for another day.) My purpose today is to talk about how we can handle our weekly chores.

Explaining weekly chores requires a little bit of explanation about our day. It is very important for Mommy, especially Stay at Home Mommy to be up and at it before anyone else in the house. (If not, Mommy may not get a shower…I know we’ve all been there. And please don’t forget to brush your teeth.) On an ideal day, my day starts between 5:30 and 6:00. I use this time to shower and get myself ready, clean my bathroom, iron Big Daddy’s clothes for the day, and make my bed. On my better days this is when I exercise or read for the day.

I have a few chores that I complete daily. Obviously, staying home means dear ol’ kitchen is cleaned around three times a day. Other daily chores include kitty litter, sweeping the wood floors, and whatever Fly Lady Zone I’m working in. (The daily chore from Fly Lady divides your home into zones. You work on one zone per week leaving no need for spring-cleaning. This coming week we’ll be in the kitchen.) Another daily thing for any mommy wanting to keep her home clear of clutter is a pick-up. Often pick-ups seem overwhelming but if everything has a place this should only take 5-10 minutes. I usually do this twice a day. Once in the morning and once before the kids go to bed while they are doing toy pick up. I also try to do small pick ups throughout the day just to maintain some kind of control.

Now to those pesky weekly chores, this is what my weekly chores look like:

I can’t imagine trying to do all my chores in one day with two toddlers. I remember my mom worked and we usually had a cleaning day. That was when I was older and there was only one child. I know for me things changed a lot from even one to two. I also can’t imagine what it will be like as our toddler and preschool world grows. I do know without some sort of routine, CHAOS will wreak havoc.

I try to finish all my daily and weekly chores by 9:30 and 10:00AM so that I am available for my babies…the real reason I’m present in this home. Besides, with potty breaks, diaper changes, meals, and squabbles…I really don’t have time for housework to be in my way!

I really hope this is as informational, (and maybe even a little inspirational), as I want it to be. I believe we can all have more peace when there is order around us. There are more posts to come, including the favorite things about my home, why I think order is important, and maybe even…my least favorite things about my home. I know many of you mommies are a few years ahead of me on this game…so, please, any tips you would like to share would be great! Let me know if you have any other ideas or questions about having a clean and quiet home.

The Home Series

Order in the Home- This post!

A Taste of Home- upcoming

Why Order Is Important- upcoming

The Piece That Holds It All Together- upcoming