Since my husband has not completed his duty of guest blogging for me, I decided I must truck on until he is ready. So...
Excuse me while I lend you a bit of my serious side…
Each winter season, I am completely amazed at some of the statements made around the holidays. Usually these statements consist of “Jesus is the reason for the season” and “let’s put Christ back in Christmas.” Well, this year, Tim Wildmon, the President of the American Family Association has topped my list of “here’s your sign” awards.
I recently received an email from my BFF that she forwarded to me from her MIL. She knew she could get me going with this one! Thanks, again BFF… you know what I love!
Apparently, because of this video:
The AFA originally urged families to Boycott Gap, Banana Republic, and Old Navy. If you can’t understand the lyrics, let me quote:
Two, Four, Six, Eight, now's the time to liberate
Go Christmas, Go Hanukkah, Go Kwanza, Go Solstice.
Go classic tree, go plastic tree, go plant a tree, go add a tree,
You 86 the rules, you do what feels just right.
Happy do whatever you wanukkah, and to all a cheery night.
Go Christmas, Go Hanukkah, go whatever holiday you wanukkah.
Mr. Wildmon and his folks were upset because Gap had the nerve to compare Christmas with the wiccans winter Solstice. And they quote in this mass email, “Solstice is celebrated by wiccans who practice witchcraft!” They go on to say that “Gap also encourages you to ‘86’ or ‘dismiss’ traditions and ‘do what feels just right.’ Find more about it here.
This just bumfuzzles me. I am almost sure that Mr. Wildmon is probably a very educated man to become the president of the AFA.
I visited the AFA website and went to the “See who’s Naughty, who is nice” page posted on November 13, 2009. Upon looking at the comments, people truly believe the reason for the season is the birth of Christ and actually coin the day a Holy Day. A Holy Day!
See more here.
Most of my readers know this, but let me give a very brief lesson for those that do not know. Christmas is not the day Christ was born. Christmas was originally exactly what is so absurd to the AFA and other “Christians” all around… pagan. Period. Constantine amalgamated pagan traditions and the Church in the 4th century to create peace and keep control. Those pagan traditions consisted of yule logs, evergreen trees, mistletoes, etc. I will not bore you with the details… look it up. See for yourself where Christmas came from. I promise you, it’s not the book of Luke. This is not my opinion. These are facts.
Note: The AFA has not yet determined whether to boycott these stores because Gap responded that the word “Christmas” was used as well.
For such are false apostles, deceitful workers, transforming themselves into the apostles of Christ. And no marvel; for Satan himself is transformed himself into an angel of light. 2 Corinthians 11:13-14
But in vain they do worship me, teaching for doctrines the commandments of men. Matthew 15:9
Friday, November 27, 2009
Wednesday, November 25, 2009
The Love Awards
More awards! It's so great to know that someone reads my blog! (Besides my husband and Tony C!) I've received two more awards! I received the Lovely Blog Award from Two Normal Moms, Alley and Lela. They have a great blog and a great way of keeping it real! And then today, much to my delight, I received an I Love Your Blog from Dealightfully Frugal. (Actually, "Deal"ighfully Frugal, but code won't let me use that and link to her url! She has a great blog that offers enlightenment and some tips on great deals.
Now...I have a major cold and am recovering from a splitting-almost-a-migraine-headache AND I have about 962 blogs to read to catch up on...so, I'm not going to give the blogs out to the fifteen or so people. I'm going my own way, I want to give the awards out to some blogs I recently found and enjoy reading. So hear goes....
The Lovely Blog Award and I Love Your Blog Awards go to....
Everyone have a great holiday! Off to be busy, busy, busy!!!
Monday, November 23, 2009
I love you, Nate!
In celebration of our upcoming anniversary on Saturday, I thought it appropriate to share a little love story, our love story. We like to think our story is a great picture of the way God works in our lives. It’s about how God will take the wrong path you walk to get you to the place He wants you to be.I have to set up our story, with a little story of my own. Before meeting Nate, I had relocated to the area moving me two hours away from my home and my family. I moved to the area because of a “boy.” I could say this was a stupid decision, but it was the best of my life. I was in an insecure, unstable relationship that would change me in so many ways. The relationship began to unravel before I ever arrived in my new city. The week before I went, I recall expressing to a co-worker, “It doesn’t matter if this doesn’t work, God wants me there for a reason.” I chose not to back out on the move. In the back of my head, of course, was the hope that this relationship would survive. This family, the “boy’s” family, blessed me in so many ways. The single mother of the three children had been in a battle with cancer. It began with breast cancer and moved throughout her body, including bone cancer, lung cancer, and brain tumors. I spent many weekends being support for my friend, his siblings, and their mother. I spent many nights in the hospice house until the loss of this amazing woman. After her death, the relationship inevitably died as well and we went our separate ways.
After this relationship, I spent much of my time in and out of meaningless “relationships” and built walls around my heart and lived my life with my cold, cold mind. I had found a job upon graduating college and was living the life of a single twenty-something female. I was an independent woman with no intent of settling down any time soon. A friend I met through work mentioned several times she wanted me to meet her brother. Her idea was that we would be good “party buddies.” Months went by and timing did not allow us to meet.
In March 2003, God’s plan rolled into place just as He had planned. I met Nate on Monday while he was in town for a job interview. He would be graduating in the spring and was making a stop by my town for a possible job offer. We met for lunch and went on our way. He was pleasant, actually, quite pleasant. I laugh about the ride back to work. His sister called and told me she wasn’t sure what I did but he was ready to marry me. That made me smile. Little did I know, within the next five days, I would have my life laid out for me.
He called on Wednesday and I saw him again on Thursday. He had come back in from school to have some medical tests completed on Friday. We spent hours talking and laughing…and believe it or not, I felt a twinge in my heart. The next day at work I received a phone call from his sister, she told me if I didn’t hear from him for a few days, she wanted me to know why. The doctors had just found a brain tumor.
That was my moment. That was the moment, I knew. God put me in his life. There was a reason God placed me in my previous relationship and that was to be able to deal with this now. After taking some time to deal with the news, Nate allowed me an opportunity to “get out” as he called it. I knew I was there for a reason and I wasn’t going anywhere. Over the next couple of weeks, tests were run and the doctors searched for answers. The biopsy itself was too risky. And then it happened; by the grace of God…it was gone. There was no explanation. The tumor never came back.
This traumatic event is what linked us. But, contrary to my belief was not the reason we were together; it was just my sign to stay. In a short period of time, the walls around my heart came down. Within eight months we were married and began our life together. Over the course of the next year, we would challenge each other’s beliefs in God and salvation. Through these challenges, we came out very different people, with a very different God than we had served before. We met people with the same beliefs. Each step of this road and each step of our roads before each other, God used to get us to a place of spiritual support we never knew possible.
Six years later, I am amazed at the husband and spiritual leader he has become. I have watched him grow and stand up as the true head of our home. I am amazed at how God changed me to be submissive and respect my husband as I am called to do. (And unless you know me, you may not understand what a feat that is!) Our walk has been hard, especially through three years of pregnancy. Our faith holds us together through it all. We truly see how God’s hand has been on us the entire way.
Nate,
I love you more than I can show you. I thank God for your honesty and humility. Thank you for always being who you are. Please don’t stop hugging me, because I really need it. I love you for giving me the breaks I need when you come home. I love you for playing with the babies when I don’t think I can do it any more. I love all your quirks, mispronunciations, made up words, and how you can’t say “th” and instead say “f.” I can’t wait to see what the next year holds for us… let’s hope not another baby yet… I would like a break!
I’m expecting a guest post from Nate later in the week… we’ll see how that goes! BTW- this picture was taken several years ago. I chose the picture because this TOTALLY embodies our daily relationship and why I've been pregnant, nursing, and/or both for three years. He really gets on my freakin’ nerves with the breast grabbing!
Friday, November 20, 2009
Thursday, November 19, 2009
I survived Mother's Day Out!
I cannot believe I made it! I survived my first day of Mother’s Day Out! I must say, you have no idea what an accomplishment this is for me. And if you don’t, you are about to find out. This has been tumultuous and I feel as if I have been running the neurotic train for about twenty-four hours.
Let me preface by saying, Lily was never without me for the first eight months of her life. She would never take a bottle and nursed every two hours for many, many months. Even after those first eight months, the amount of time she was away from me has been minimal. Her Nana has always been the person to keep her and due to being an hour drive away, that has not been frequent. (Although, Nana does do her best to see her babies when she can!) I never planned this; I just could not cut the cord when it needed to be. Now, JJ is a much different story. He is fine. I realize he will survive and can easily go my own way.
I believe Mother’s Day Out is a wonderful program and much needed. In addition, there is the Parent’s Night Out one Friday a month. Nate and I both agree we should take full advantage of this due to our distance from any support we might have and our great need to reconnect without children in our presence.
So, I have everything set up and am ready to start. Lily and I go out to buy her a very special new lunch box to take her goods in. I continue to explain to her just what we are preparing for and that Mamma Llama is always there, even if she’s not right here. She usually just looks at me and says, “Mommy bye bye.” As she shakes her head no.
I decided today would be a great day to start since, CASA for Kids needs a little help with a mass mailing. I would be just down the road in case there is an incident. So, we’re set.
When I went to bed last night, I swear, I thought I was contemplating labor again. My heart pounded and my mind raced. Just the thought of walking down that dreaded hall way was so terrifying. I knew I could make it though. I just had to!
This morning was a great treat for a mommy who has NEVER had to get herself, a baby, and a toddler ready to actually be somewhere that mattered. And this being, feeding them breakfast, changing clothes and diapers, packing two diaper bags, lunches, comfies, and my own purse. Luckily, I did have the bags packed and clothes ready the night before. To add to the stress, I had to get eye shadow and lipstick off Lily that she managed to continuously get into through out the one and a half hour I had to accomplish this feat. I managed to be out the door by 8:34 A.M. The twenty-five minute drive really did not mesh well with my nausea that would not go away.
We made it and JJ was dumped off just fine. I knew he would be fine. So, we move onto Lily. We get her settled, I tell her bye as she plays, and head out the door. 1…2...3…here it comes. I can hear her crying for me and I just keep walking. My hands are shaking and I have to sit down to write my check, which may have totally been written the wrong way. I’m tearing up and really don’t know how I’m going to make it. I can do this, I think can, I think I can.
I get to the parking lot and call Nate since I’ve missed his call already. He hears me crying and he….LAUGHS!! He laughs at me! Now come on.
My shaking did not stop until well into putting several letter packets together. I have to say thanks to the lovely Missy for keeping me company during this tragic event. They said they would call by 10:00 if she had not stopped crying. No call. No call. I called them. No answer. Mrs. Meri finally calls back and she’s OK. She’s cried on and off, but she is OK.
It’s 11:30 and I head to pick her up. If I go early, I can get the details, right? I find JJ sitting in a high chair eating Cheerios grinning away. He could care less. I leave him there while I go to check on my Lil. There she is…she looks at me…and carries on. No running to me. No “Mommy’s back!” Just stays put.
Whew. We made it.
Now let me add, Nate called like five times during this whole process. “Have you heard from them?” “ Have you heard from them?” And he laughed at me!
Want to know more about CASA? Check out the National Website and for you locals, CASA for Kids, Inc serves Sullivan and Hawkins County. Most Juvenile Courts around the country have programs and it is well worth your time to support abused and neglected children in the court system!
Let me preface by saying, Lily was never without me for the first eight months of her life. She would never take a bottle and nursed every two hours for many, many months. Even after those first eight months, the amount of time she was away from me has been minimal. Her Nana has always been the person to keep her and due to being an hour drive away, that has not been frequent. (Although, Nana does do her best to see her babies when she can!) I never planned this; I just could not cut the cord when it needed to be. Now, JJ is a much different story. He is fine. I realize he will survive and can easily go my own way.
I believe Mother’s Day Out is a wonderful program and much needed. In addition, there is the Parent’s Night Out one Friday a month. Nate and I both agree we should take full advantage of this due to our distance from any support we might have and our great need to reconnect without children in our presence.
So, I have everything set up and am ready to start. Lily and I go out to buy her a very special new lunch box to take her goods in. I continue to explain to her just what we are preparing for and that Mamma Llama is always there, even if she’s not right here. She usually just looks at me and says, “Mommy bye bye.” As she shakes her head no.
I decided today would be a great day to start since, CASA for Kids needs a little help with a mass mailing. I would be just down the road in case there is an incident. So, we’re set.
When I went to bed last night, I swear, I thought I was contemplating labor again. My heart pounded and my mind raced. Just the thought of walking down that dreaded hall way was so terrifying. I knew I could make it though. I just had to!
This morning was a great treat for a mommy who has NEVER had to get herself, a baby, and a toddler ready to actually be somewhere that mattered. And this being, feeding them breakfast, changing clothes and diapers, packing two diaper bags, lunches, comfies, and my own purse. Luckily, I did have the bags packed and clothes ready the night before. To add to the stress, I had to get eye shadow and lipstick off Lily that she managed to continuously get into through out the one and a half hour I had to accomplish this feat. I managed to be out the door by 8:34 A.M. The twenty-five minute drive really did not mesh well with my nausea that would not go away.
We made it and JJ was dumped off just fine. I knew he would be fine. So, we move onto Lily. We get her settled, I tell her bye as she plays, and head out the door. 1…2...3…here it comes. I can hear her crying for me and I just keep walking. My hands are shaking and I have to sit down to write my check, which may have totally been written the wrong way. I’m tearing up and really don’t know how I’m going to make it. I can do this, I think can, I think I can.
I get to the parking lot and call Nate since I’ve missed his call already. He hears me crying and he….LAUGHS!! He laughs at me! Now come on.
My shaking did not stop until well into putting several letter packets together. I have to say thanks to the lovely Missy for keeping me company during this tragic event. They said they would call by 10:00 if she had not stopped crying. No call. No call. I called them. No answer. Mrs. Meri finally calls back and she’s OK. She’s cried on and off, but she is OK.
It’s 11:30 and I head to pick her up. If I go early, I can get the details, right? I find JJ sitting in a high chair eating Cheerios grinning away. He could care less. I leave him there while I go to check on my Lil. There she is…she looks at me…and carries on. No running to me. No “Mommy’s back!” Just stays put.
Whew. We made it.
Now let me add, Nate called like five times during this whole process. “Have you heard from them?” “ Have you heard from them?” And he laughed at me!
Want to know more about CASA? Check out the National Website and for you locals, CASA for Kids, Inc serves Sullivan and Hawkins County. Most Juvenile Courts around the country have programs and it is well worth your time to support abused and neglected children in the court system!
Sunday, November 15, 2009
Alpha Mom- I AM NOT!
With a little inspiration from Theta Mom, I decided to do a little research on Alpha Moms vs. Beta Moms. From my initial perspective, I feel that I am a Beta Mom with Alpha Mom tendencies. After doing a little research, I find myself extremely slightly offended. Beta Moms are referred to as Slacker Moms? EXCUSE ME! I am no slacker. I am, for lack of a better term, balls to the wall day in day out. I’m a stay at home mom who has enough going on with diaper changes, scheduling, and feeding x 2 to not make a big deal out of placing my children on waiting lists at the most prestigious pre-schools. I prefer to take what’s easy and go with it…because no matter what, it’s not easy.
With my Alpha Mom tendencies, you’ll see me checking out Kindermusik classes, but realizing how silly it really is to spend the money, especially with only one salary coming in. I’m sure they would learn with sign language and musical engagement, but Beta Mom tells me, they’ll learn it eventually anyway. As an Alpha Mom, you’ll find me cutting out and coloring letters, trying to pound the alphabet in my little one’s head. But as a Beta Mom, you’ll find me allowing her to rip it up and let her baby brother chew on it. Alpha Mom was pumped up about gymnastics starting when Lily turned two and became disappointed when she could not focus for forty-five minutes. Beta Mom realized we don’t know what the day will unfurl during the terrible twos.
During my “research,” I found several Beta Mom blogs, along with a few Alpha Mom articles. The most interesting article was from USA Today. I was reading this article on the way to my parent’s home for the weekend while the little ones were sleeping in the car. I found through the article that I believe my own personal battle between Alpha Mom and Beta Mom is that I’m a high achiever but am very anti-superficial…or should I say materialistic. I know that may sound offensive to some who are more on the trendy side… but let me clarify. I would love to be trendy and appear to be pulled together. I actually covet those characteristics, but in my core… it’s just not me. So for me, it turns into materialism and very fake. I actually have a friend that I met through online social networking. This wonderful mother-do-it-all-er is what I would seriously consider an Alpha Mom. I only know her through online connections, but she has everything perfectly put together. Her children are always perfectly coordinated according to the date and holiday. She’s on top of communication with her friends, has time for a small side business or two, and is perfectly pulled together and coordinated herself!!! Gasp! She literally only sleeps like three hours a day. (Yes, H.M., this ones for you!)
So, anyways, I’m still thinking that I’m a Beta Mom, because I’m not the most trendy, I’m not working hard to move to the top of my job, and because I allow my kids to eat chew, and poop mud. They’ve been licked in the mouth by dogs since they were newborns. And I just don’t care. So, in my mind, there is the stamp of approval… Beta Mom Approved. This article I’m speaking of explains that Beta Moms are coming up against the Alpha Moms in a movement to say, “Chill out!”
On this car ride, I’m explaining to my dear Nate, exactly what I am doing. And in all honesty, mocking the aggravation that Alpha Moms must be going through. I mean, really, “Chill out!” So, I read him the description of an Alpha Mom.
With my Alpha Mom tendencies, you’ll see me checking out Kindermusik classes, but realizing how silly it really is to spend the money, especially with only one salary coming in. I’m sure they would learn with sign language and musical engagement, but Beta Mom tells me, they’ll learn it eventually anyway. As an Alpha Mom, you’ll find me cutting out and coloring letters, trying to pound the alphabet in my little one’s head. But as a Beta Mom, you’ll find me allowing her to rip it up and let her baby brother chew on it. Alpha Mom was pumped up about gymnastics starting when Lily turned two and became disappointed when she could not focus for forty-five minutes. Beta Mom realized we don’t know what the day will unfurl during the terrible twos.
During my “research,” I found several Beta Mom blogs, along with a few Alpha Mom articles. The most interesting article was from USA Today. I was reading this article on the way to my parent’s home for the weekend while the little ones were sleeping in the car. I found through the article that I believe my own personal battle between Alpha Mom and Beta Mom is that I’m a high achiever but am very anti-superficial…or should I say materialistic. I know that may sound offensive to some who are more on the trendy side… but let me clarify. I would love to be trendy and appear to be pulled together. I actually covet those characteristics, but in my core… it’s just not me. So for me, it turns into materialism and very fake. I actually have a friend that I met through online social networking. This wonderful mother-do-it-all-er is what I would seriously consider an Alpha Mom. I only know her through online connections, but she has everything perfectly put together. Her children are always perfectly coordinated according to the date and holiday. She’s on top of communication with her friends, has time for a small side business or two, and is perfectly pulled together and coordinated herself!!! Gasp! She literally only sleeps like three hours a day. (Yes, H.M., this ones for you!)
So, anyways, I’m still thinking that I’m a Beta Mom, because I’m not the most trendy, I’m not working hard to move to the top of my job, and because I allow my kids to eat chew, and poop mud. They’ve been licked in the mouth by dogs since they were newborns. And I just don’t care. So, in my mind, there is the stamp of approval… Beta Mom Approved. This article I’m speaking of explains that Beta Moms are coming up against the Alpha Moms in a movement to say, “Chill out!”
On this car ride, I’m explaining to my dear Nate, exactly what I am doing. And in all honesty, mocking the aggravation that Alpha Moms must be going through. I mean, really, “Chill out!” So, I read him the description of an Alpha Mom.
Me: “Alphas are educated, can-do types whose organization skills bring corporate mentality to their parenting and a technological agility to their problem-solving.”
He just looks at me… and then says… “You are riding down the road, tethering your laptop to your blackberry and looking at blogs about parenting?”
I’m not sure if that was a question or a statement. So, I go on.
Me (quoting the article again): “Beta Moms have it together sometimes. They may forget to send back permission slips or lose track of their turn for team snacks.”
We look at each other and laugh. I would NEVER forget a permission slip or snacks. Actually, I would have it 1. Scheduled in my blackberry with a reminder, and 2. Do the most creative snack I could think of!
How funny! The more I look, the more I realize, I’m not the cool, chilled-out Beta Mom. I’m the overbearing, stiff-necked Alpha Mom! And the more I think of it, the reason I let my kids eat, chew, and poop mud is for the sensory experience. It’s the same with the dog-licking thing. Everything I allow or don’t allow my kids to do has something to do with how they will learn or experience something from it.
The article goes on to speak about how these high achieving mothers are used to being able to control things, but run into a problem with their kids. I think they sum it up greatly when they say that we can’t control how our kids turn out by what we do, but that “parenting is about finding out who your child is and fostering their growth and development as individuals.”
So, with that said, I’m going to go google how to not be an Alpha Mom…
Tuesday, November 10, 2009
Lemonade Award
Don’t we just love awards! I’ve received my second from Maddy Brand. Thank you! The Lemonade Award is all about attitude and gratitude. I may be representing a little more attitude than gratitude! So here it is. I’m nominating 10 blogs I think have great attitude and gratitude. A couple of the recipients I chose aren’t much of the award receiving-awarding type…but I wanted you to know I appreciate the great attitude and gratitude you share in your blogs! Take it or leave it! It’s up to you.
The rules for this award:- Put the Lemonade logo on your blog or within your post.- Nominate at least 10 blogs with great attitude or gratitude.- Link the nominees within your post.- Let the nominees know they have received this award by commenting on their blog.- Share the love and link to the person from whom you received this award.
This award is being passed on to:
Abundantly Living
The rules for this award:- Put the Lemonade logo on your blog or within your post.- Nominate at least 10 blogs with great attitude or gratitude.- Link the nominees within your post.- Let the nominees know they have received this award by commenting on their blog.- Share the love and link to the person from whom you received this award.
This award is being passed on to:
Abundantly Living
Saturday, November 7, 2009
Drop The Towel and Smile
For those of you ladies that have not yet had a baby, understand this now, showers are wonderful. Showers are orgasmic. Enjoy them now because after babies, showers will never be the same. In the early months, you may be happy to even take a shower This was one such weekend. Baby Bear was asleep for his morning nap. Papa Bear and Little Bear were playing with baby dolls. Everything started out fine. I was enjoying the hot water and the steam. (Like I said, it becomes almost orgasmic when it happens so infrequently.) Suddenly, through the shower door I see Papa Bear and Little Bear creeping in. I obviously know something is up. The door opens and there stands Little Bear with a tall cup of cold water. She loves to throw cold water on my feet when I shower. I have no idea where she got this idea. Ahem. Anyways, she throws it on my feet, I fake scream to let her know it’s cccooooold and carry on. However, Papa Bear is not finished. He opens the door and I manage to dodge another big cold cup over the head. I don’t mind reminding Papa Bear, “I’m getting myself ready for tonight so if I were you I would think before you get anything started.” Doh! That one gets him. After saying something about that being cheap he walks away head down and tail between legs. Of course, this is not before I must endure at least one cup of the H2O. It was COLD!
Sigh. Finally, I proceed with my
Me: So, I was talking to my mom…
Papa Bear (holding the camera with a sheepish grin, eyes darted to the left and up.): uh huh...
Me: Listen to me! Quit thinking about whatever you want to scheme about and listen to me!
Papa Bear: What! I am listening, you said….
Me: All I ask for is a little time. Is that too much to ask?
So, I drop the towel and smile. He gets the picture and him and Little Bear go their merry way. I enjoyed those few moments of peace preparing for the day.
Friday, November 6, 2009
The Biggest Lie I Ever Told
This is so funny. I find a creative writing prompt for “The Biggest Lie I Ever Told” and sit giggling trying to think of the lies I have told through my life. I was thinking this could get funny and it actually gets embarrassing.
In reality, I am not a good liar. I can’t do it. I remember doing it when I was younger… not really lies, but not telling the whole truth. Is that considered a lie? I hid stuff. Personal stuff. Don’t we all? If we were completely honest, people would know just what we really are. So, I didn’t tell one, but lived a big fat lie when I was nineteen or twenty. This was a life-changing lie for me in more ways than one. I hurt someone very special because of this lie and wished more than anything the roles had been reversed. I found the pain of hurting someone was more than I could bear. Now, honestly, this was not the first time I hurt someone. I have more secrets in my past than I care to share, but this was someone I truly cared about. This was the lie that led me to the life of no lies and complete honesty. Well, sort of. Nate just learned he has to ask very specific questions if he wants to know the answer.
I really want to think of a funny lie… but it’s just not there. I think of my friend, SneedSnoopandF*, and think, surely all the funny stuff we did, there had to be a funny lie in there somewhere… nothin’; other than the big fat lie. Why are lies so serious? Nate lies all the time to be funny. I have to tell people constantly that he’s not telling the truth… even his own mother. I can seriously be in the room with the person he is lying to if they’re on the phone with him, and know by their expressions that he is lying.
Lies aren’t always bad are they? Sometimes we lie for the good of another. I can think of one such lie… let me reminisce back to 1995 to a not so bad lie. I apologize now if this is a little mind numbing… I had to think of a lie I could actually tell about!
A couple of students at CHS had a sports engagement to attend that conflicted with a certain Algebra II test in Mrs. Reyes class. B.D. and L.C. approached me for a little help with test in hand. I wasn’t sure how they got the test, but just knew they had to take the test early. So, I approach my good, valedictorian bound friend, Unspoken, with said test and we decide to work the problems out. And yes, she knew it was the test. Well, we hand it back to the pair and the day goes on. We take our test and of course score none other than 100… not because we had the test… we always made A’s. Shout out to Mu Alpha Theta! Anyways, when I had finished the test T.M. wanted some help, so the genius I am whip out the previous “cheat test,” (that I’m not really sure now how I got back), and hand it to him. Well, apparently, this causes a chain effect of pass the test back. Goofball R.H. has been sitting there for an hour staring at his desk and suddenly is writing like a squirrel eating nuts. Well, we all know Mrs. Reyes ain’t havin’ it! She goes over and picks that blasted pre test right up. Whose handwriting is all over it? None other than valedictorian bound, Unspoken’s handwriting. Oh dear! So, it’s my time to become the hero. I take the heat. I say I got a copy of the test, without saying from whom, and let Mrs. Reyes know, Unspoken had no clue it was the test. Everyone’s home free, all 4 or 5 of them, except for R.H. and me. This resulted in a big fat 0 for me, taking my A+ average to a big fat C! I had nothing to lose. Unspoken, she had a lot of hard work towards a big goal to lose. We giggled about it on graduation night when our Calculus class smiled for a pic with Mrs. Reyes. She had a good speech. Where is Unspoken now? Working at the university in the Big City. Wonder if she ever recalls that day? See, lies aren’t always bad…
And if you’ve met me since 1999, you can bet you’ve got the truth, the whole truth, and nothing but the truth… unless you didn’t ask specifics of course.
And if you happen to read this Unspoken, I'm sure there are grammatical errors. I'm self conscious just thinking you may be reading it! :)
In reality, I am not a good liar. I can’t do it. I remember doing it when I was younger… not really lies, but not telling the whole truth. Is that considered a lie? I hid stuff. Personal stuff. Don’t we all? If we were completely honest, people would know just what we really are. So, I didn’t tell one, but lived a big fat lie when I was nineteen or twenty. This was a life-changing lie for me in more ways than one. I hurt someone very special because of this lie and wished more than anything the roles had been reversed. I found the pain of hurting someone was more than I could bear. Now, honestly, this was not the first time I hurt someone. I have more secrets in my past than I care to share, but this was someone I truly cared about. This was the lie that led me to the life of no lies and complete honesty. Well, sort of. Nate just learned he has to ask very specific questions if he wants to know the answer.
I really want to think of a funny lie… but it’s just not there. I think of my friend, SneedSnoopandF*, and think, surely all the funny stuff we did, there had to be a funny lie in there somewhere… nothin’; other than the big fat lie. Why are lies so serious? Nate lies all the time to be funny. I have to tell people constantly that he’s not telling the truth… even his own mother. I can seriously be in the room with the person he is lying to if they’re on the phone with him, and know by their expressions that he is lying.
Lies aren’t always bad are they? Sometimes we lie for the good of another. I can think of one such lie… let me reminisce back to 1995 to a not so bad lie. I apologize now if this is a little mind numbing… I had to think of a lie I could actually tell about!
A couple of students at CHS had a sports engagement to attend that conflicted with a certain Algebra II test in Mrs. Reyes class. B.D. and L.C. approached me for a little help with test in hand. I wasn’t sure how they got the test, but just knew they had to take the test early. So, I approach my good, valedictorian bound friend, Unspoken, with said test and we decide to work the problems out. And yes, she knew it was the test. Well, we hand it back to the pair and the day goes on. We take our test and of course score none other than 100… not because we had the test… we always made A’s. Shout out to Mu Alpha Theta! Anyways, when I had finished the test T.M. wanted some help, so the genius I am whip out the previous “cheat test,” (that I’m not really sure now how I got back), and hand it to him. Well, apparently, this causes a chain effect of pass the test back. Goofball R.H. has been sitting there for an hour staring at his desk and suddenly is writing like a squirrel eating nuts. Well, we all know Mrs. Reyes ain’t havin’ it! She goes over and picks that blasted pre test right up. Whose handwriting is all over it? None other than valedictorian bound, Unspoken’s handwriting. Oh dear! So, it’s my time to become the hero. I take the heat. I say I got a copy of the test, without saying from whom, and let Mrs. Reyes know, Unspoken had no clue it was the test. Everyone’s home free, all 4 or 5 of them, except for R.H. and me. This resulted in a big fat 0 for me, taking my A+ average to a big fat C! I had nothing to lose. Unspoken, she had a lot of hard work towards a big goal to lose. We giggled about it on graduation night when our Calculus class smiled for a pic with Mrs. Reyes. She had a good speech. Where is Unspoken now? Working at the university in the Big City. Wonder if she ever recalls that day? See, lies aren’t always bad…
And if you’ve met me since 1999, you can bet you’ve got the truth, the whole truth, and nothing but the truth… unless you didn’t ask specifics of course.
And if you happen to read this Unspoken, I'm sure there are grammatical errors. I'm self conscious just thinking you may be reading it! :)
Wednesday, November 4, 2009
Spare the Rod
(Addendum: Yes, I’m placing an addendum at the beginning. Nate told me to wait a day to post this. He said it sounded angry. With respect for his opinion, I deleted some things to soften it up a bit. But guess what, I am angry, this isn’t my normal tone for my blog… but sometimes we’re angry and the blog is a great outlet… carry on and ignore the anger. By the way, I don’t see the anger in the post.)
I’m not sure where this is going to go and I don’t know where to start… all I know is…this has been one hellacious trek up the hump to Wednesday and I’m looking forward to the ride down. Be prepared as I may rant. The stress of this week has given me a headache for three days. That headache, does not work well with the stress going on in my head. It is a VICOUS cycle.
My week started Monday with repercussions of participating in Halloween, which is another story for another day. Landing me on Tuesday with parenting issues that make me crazy! And here we are on Wednesday with a bunch of reflecting bungled up in my head.
Parenting has always been a big thing for me, even before I was a parent. I had my own issues growing up with my parents, I worked with parents and children in family services, and I watched my friends and family members struggle along raising their little ones. It is no secret; Nate and I even considered not having kids for a long time. We didn’t want to give up our lives and children these days seemed too out of control.
There are certain behaviors that many kids today are getting away with that we find completely unacceptable. Before we had children, we said our kids would not behave the way others were behaving. We still stand by it today… it is just a little harder right now. I stand with the school of thought that children are born evil. They do not have to be taught to be selfish, deceitful, foolish, or flat out little liars. They’re born this way. This is our nature. This is who we all are in our core. That’s why we need a Savior. I liken the raising of our children to God’s disciplining of His children. We are on the wrong path from the beginning and His loving rod leads us to the right path… and occasionally whacks us when we fall off that path. He who spares his rod hates his son, But he who loves him disciplines him promptly. Proverbs 13:24
So where is the love parents? What are we doing! We are so messed up in this culture that regards self-esteem instead of esteeming God that as parents we are lost in what is good and Godly for our children. We were raised in this culture of high self-esteem. We’ve been taught that spanking and discipline will harm our children. What God says is conflicting with what Dr. Phil and an entire world of experts says. We are teaching our kids that if all your friends have it then you will too! We’re teaching them to not respect authority by challenging their teachers that Little Johnny would not do that! There are no consequences for behavior. I swear! Through all this preaching, I’ve come to the conclusion that the failing economy and the rate of foreclosures can all be chopped up to BAD PARENTING!
That is so not where I was going with this. I was going to rant about how hard it is to do the right thing for your child’s future instead of what’s easy today. But, it needed to be said, so I’ll leave it there.
I read a lot about parenting because like I said, we feel kind of lost in how we were raised and how God meant for it to be. I’m often shunned for my structured sleep and eating schedules and my desire to provide my children with stability. (I’m a semi-Baby Wiser!) I never get it, because that’s what they need. I want to do what’s best for my kids, not “what didn’t hurt us.” That’s why I suffered through the process of breastfeeding for a year even if it meant no freedom for me. We’re home by 7:00 most nights, because they need their sleep. And now that the time for discipline has begun, I’ll do the same thing…sacrifice and consistency. It’s not about what makes them happy today, but what is best for them in the long run. Permissive parenting is evil, and I pray that God does not allow me to fall into such a way… because it would be so much easier than doing it His way.
It’s hard to sum this up; I could literally go on for days about this stuff. I knew from the beginning parenting would not be easy. Not only would it not be easy, but also it would be the hardest job I ever took on. Another life is in my hands. The decisions I make today affect who she is in eighteen years, oh crap, sixteen…. Time’s running out! Can we prepare her to be the responsible, mature, respectful, humble, God fearing, independent adult we want her to be?
Maybe I should have her hearing checked…
Like what I said? Check out http://www.johnrosemond.com/
I’m not sure where this is going to go and I don’t know where to start… all I know is…this has been one hellacious trek up the hump to Wednesday and I’m looking forward to the ride down. Be prepared as I may rant. The stress of this week has given me a headache for three days. That headache, does not work well with the stress going on in my head. It is a VICOUS cycle.
My week started Monday with repercussions of participating in Halloween, which is another story for another day. Landing me on Tuesday with parenting issues that make me crazy! And here we are on Wednesday with a bunch of reflecting bungled up in my head.
Parenting has always been a big thing for me, even before I was a parent. I had my own issues growing up with my parents, I worked with parents and children in family services, and I watched my friends and family members struggle along raising their little ones. It is no secret; Nate and I even considered not having kids for a long time. We didn’t want to give up our lives and children these days seemed too out of control.
There are certain behaviors that many kids today are getting away with that we find completely unacceptable. Before we had children, we said our kids would not behave the way others were behaving. We still stand by it today… it is just a little harder right now. I stand with the school of thought that children are born evil. They do not have to be taught to be selfish, deceitful, foolish, or flat out little liars. They’re born this way. This is our nature. This is who we all are in our core. That’s why we need a Savior. I liken the raising of our children to God’s disciplining of His children. We are on the wrong path from the beginning and His loving rod leads us to the right path… and occasionally whacks us when we fall off that path. He who spares his rod hates his son, But he who loves him disciplines him promptly. Proverbs 13:24
So where is the love parents? What are we doing! We are so messed up in this culture that regards self-esteem instead of esteeming God that as parents we are lost in what is good and Godly for our children. We were raised in this culture of high self-esteem. We’ve been taught that spanking and discipline will harm our children. What God says is conflicting with what Dr. Phil and an entire world of experts says. We are teaching our kids that if all your friends have it then you will too! We’re teaching them to not respect authority by challenging their teachers that Little Johnny would not do that! There are no consequences for behavior. I swear! Through all this preaching, I’ve come to the conclusion that the failing economy and the rate of foreclosures can all be chopped up to BAD PARENTING!
That is so not where I was going with this. I was going to rant about how hard it is to do the right thing for your child’s future instead of what’s easy today. But, it needed to be said, so I’ll leave it there.
I read a lot about parenting because like I said, we feel kind of lost in how we were raised and how God meant for it to be. I’m often shunned for my structured sleep and eating schedules and my desire to provide my children with stability. (I’m a semi-Baby Wiser!) I never get it, because that’s what they need. I want to do what’s best for my kids, not “what didn’t hurt us.” That’s why I suffered through the process of breastfeeding for a year even if it meant no freedom for me. We’re home by 7:00 most nights, because they need their sleep. And now that the time for discipline has begun, I’ll do the same thing…sacrifice and consistency. It’s not about what makes them happy today, but what is best for them in the long run. Permissive parenting is evil, and I pray that God does not allow me to fall into such a way… because it would be so much easier than doing it His way.
It’s hard to sum this up; I could literally go on for days about this stuff. I knew from the beginning parenting would not be easy. Not only would it not be easy, but also it would be the hardest job I ever took on. Another life is in my hands. The decisions I make today affect who she is in eighteen years, oh crap, sixteen…. Time’s running out! Can we prepare her to be the responsible, mature, respectful, humble, God fearing, independent adult we want her to be?
Maybe I should have her hearing checked…
Like what I said? Check out http://www.johnrosemond.com/
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