Grace Living

Last week when everyone else was determining their “words” for the year, I was left wondering what one word would I want to lead me through the upcoming year. Thinking perhaps I should just move on and leave behind any yearly resolutions or words, it dawned on me.

At the end of 2011, I began to realize the burden of self-reliance I had been carrying through much of the year. Every corner I turned was about how I could make all the difference. I could make the difference in my home. I could determine my children’s obedience. I could determine their future. I could determine what people thought about my family and me. I became so caught up in the appearance of godliness that I lost the heart of true, Holy Spirit-driven godliness. For the first time ever, I was looking at myself and thinking, “Legalism? Me? Nooo!” The sin of self-righteousness was speaking boldly to my face. I knew what had crept into my heart this year.

So, Sunday I claimed it. Grace. This year is my year of grace. The year where I remember His grace...

Grace in regeneration.

Grace in sanctification,

Grace in parenting.

Grace in relationships.

Grace in communication.

Grace in living.

I want to see grace in what I read, in what I pray, and how I walk. I want to give grace as it was given to me. I want to precede knowing that God receives glory out of ugly, rebellious, disobedience just as much as He receives glory out of lovely, devoted, obedience. I mean, without the ugly how could we really know how much we need Him?

God hasn't left me alone to search for grace but is immediately making grace real in His word and through the story of Joseph. Joseph, betrayed by his own brothers and yet so willing to offer grace to them. Not only grace, but the very best of everything he had. He kissed them and wept over them, the same men who planned his death and took him away from the land he knew. Joseph truly understood God’s sovereignty even through His hardships. He spent years in prison for being wrongfully accused…and yet, he could see God’s purpose in it all. He could see that God glorifying grace is not always lovely and not always what we would choose for ourselves.

“His brothers also came and fell down before him and said, "Behold, we are your servants." But Joseph said to them, "Do not fear, for am I in the place of God? As for you, you meant evil against me, but God meant it for good, to bring it about that many people should be kept alive, as they are today. So do not fear; I will provide for you and your little ones." Thus he comforted them and spoke kindly to them.” Genesis 50: 18-20 (ESV, emphasis added)

2012...a year to remember and grow in grace.

Resolution #5: Check

After one and a half months of training, our Memorial Day morning was spent running an 8K-road race…in the sun and the rain. Number 5 has been accomplished and two weeks earlier than expected!

After two weeks of what felt like near pneumonia, I managed to run right into the finish line at 51:00 minutes. (This is two or three minutes LESS than what I expected!) I came in about 10 minutes after my darling husband had crossed the line. Somehow, someway, I placed third in my age division with Nate finishing second. AND…we won a Last Will and Testament from a local attorney as a door prize!

We’ll be running two races each in July. Run! Run! Run!

Sayonara, Adios, Au Revoir, Sampai jumpa…for now.

So, Nate thinks it’s funny that I’m going to blog about not blogging. Whateva, brotha!

If you would recall…HERE…I had a lot to do this year. As I have been complaining about for…eh…the last two months… I have a lot to do and the list keeps growing. In addition to the original “list,” I’ve since added being more “frugal aware” and hoping to get some preschool activities down for Ms. Lily in the upcoming weeks and months.

Let us recall “The List” and see how far we have come (Keep in mind, this was supposed to start in December 2009:

1. Simply, start working out at least 5 out of 7 days. No. I’m still as weak and floppy as on December 1, 2009. I’ve worked out about 3 times in 2 months. Today being one of those.
2. Drink more water. Sort of. I have drank more water, but one glass every two or three days doesn’t suffice.
3. Eat less sugar. …right. This one made me LAUGH OUT LOUD!
4. By April 2010, resume training for my second-degree black belt. Still time, but must get with numero uno or Joe Grosso will kick my bumbino! And then I will throw up and feed the cat-titos. 5. Run the CASA 8K on June 12, 2010. Again, see #1 and #4.
6. Spend at least 6 months out of 2010 not pregnant, nursing, and/or both. Not there yet…looking to start this one in April. However, God may have different plans.
7. Spend more time studying scripture. I have done this but see down below.
8. Find a church family. We may be on our way. We have been attending a church for around 2 months and we are currently involved in an inquirers class that should last the next 3 or 4 months. We’ll see.
9. Pray more as a family. We are doing this, but it still needs some work.

10. Spend at least one night a month with my husband without babies. (Not enough, but a start.) I honestly think we may be doing OK on this one.

Now, to why I am going on a hiatus. I have around two slots of time out of my day everyday. One of those time slots is at 5:00 in the morning…which actually makes those times slots one and not two since I have the most comfortable bed in the world at 5AM. I have some pretty big goals that are going to take up the majority of that time. I plan to do a complete reading of the entire Bible over the next 6 months. During this time frame, I thought it would be a good idea to take a break from blogging and complete the reading as well as get myself ready for Tae Kwon Do and the 8K. I believe I may do an update occasionally on this progress but take a break from reading and commenting. I probably will have those days when I just feel like I must write...it's in our blood isn't it?! I feel these other things are a little more important right now. I know since I am in such high demand all the time, you may need to contact me. Find my email on my blogger profile or check me out on Facebook.

I’ll miss reading your blogs. If you have a REALLY good one, one you need some fiery back up on…email me so I can check it out!

The First Step is The Hardest...

Pant…pant…GASP! I can’t breathe! In lieu of stretching, I decided to blog for accountability. Even though, I didn’t wanna do it, I got myself up on the old Sole E55 today and elliptical-ed my way through twenty minutes of pain. ridiculous! I have never, and I mean ever, been this weak.

I would say out of shape, but even in days when I had strength and six-pack abs, my second hand smoker lungs could not even grace the track for a mile. As much as I loved freedom upon moving away from home, I embraced a love for cardio. And I mean heart pumpin’, blood sweatin’, cardio. LOVED IT! It took a lot of hard work to build up the strength to make it through long runs and two-hour “Grosso” Tae kwon do workouts. But I did it…and now it’s gone…

Not only have I lost my cardio, I’ve lost my strength. What have these kids done to me! My arms feel like jello, there is cottage cheese cellulite in places I didn’t know could have it, my stomach looks like an old rotten potato…and at the risk of too much information… (edited...becuase it really was too much information!) Now that’s just wrong.

So with all this said, I have a plan. Yes, a plan. I’m going to be a lean, mean, Momma Machine. This month, I’m merely going to focus on regaining minimal strength. I will start with cardio and add weights when I feel I have been consistent. Once this is established, what my body has not already forced me to change, will be changed on my diet. I feel that when you work out, your mind and body sometimes force you to make some nutritional changes, such as more fluid intake.

It’s never too early, so let me share my New Year’s/Beginning in December Plan: (some of this does not pertain to just physical health and is no particular order…

1. Simply, start working out at least 5 out of 7 days.
2. Drink more water.
3. Eat less sugar.
4. By April 2010, resume training for my second-degree black belt.
5. Run the CASA 8K on June 12, 2010.
6. Spend at least 6 months out of 2010 not pregnant, nursing, and/or both.
7. Spend more time studying scripture.
8. Find a church family.
9. Pray more as a family.
10. Spend at least one night a month with my husband without babies. (Not enough, but a start.)

Totally did not know that would come out with a nice even number of 10. And a side note, I have never had even one New Year's resolution before.

Here’s to accountability!